Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.
***********
My wife suggested a book for me to read to enhance our relationship. It's titled, "Women are from Venus, Men are Wrong."
***********
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
***********
Honolulu — it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
***********
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
***********
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish...
***********
Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.
***********
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
***********
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
***********
After an acquaintance of ten minutes, many women will exchange confidences that a man would not reveal to a lifelong friend.
***********
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby.
***********
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henry Youngman
***********
"I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go." Rose in Titanic. Several seconds later, poor little Jack sinks to the bottom of the Atlantic...
***********
An archaeologist is best husband a woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."
Agatha Christie
***********
Women like silent men, they think they're listening.
***********
Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I
go Fridays."
Henry Youngman.
*
**********
If a man is talking in the woods and no woman hears him... is he still wrong?
***********
I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
***********
I fell in love at first sight… I should have looked twice.
***********
Before marriage a man yearns for a woman after marriage the ‘y’ is silent .
***********
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want then when you see what the other person has,
you wish you had ordered that.
***********
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher
. Socrates
***********
My wife suggested a book for me to read to enhance our relationship. It's titled, "Women are from Venus, Men are Wrong."
***********
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
***********
Honolulu — it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
***********
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
***********
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish...
***********
Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.
***********
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
***********
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
***********
After an acquaintance of ten minutes, many women will exchange confidences that a man would not reveal to a lifelong friend.
***********
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby.
***********
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henry Youngman
***********
"I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go." Rose in Titanic. Several seconds later, poor little Jack sinks to the bottom of the Atlantic...
***********
An archaeologist is best husband a woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."
Agatha Christie
***********
Women like silent men, they think they're listening.
***********
Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I
go Fridays."
Henry Youngman.
*
**********
If a man is talking in the woods and no woman hears him... is he still wrong?
***********
I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
***********
I fell in love at first sight… I should have looked twice.
***********
Before marriage a man yearns for a woman after marriage the ‘y’ is silent .
***********
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want then when you see what the other person has,
you wish you had ordered that.
***********
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher
. Socrates
No comments:
Post a Comment